Victim of Leadership

The past week has caused me to rethink the popular dictum, “leaders are born, not made”. To start with an introduction for the uninitiated, marketing fair is a research tool devised by our bschool to solve problems for companies.

It is touted as the most involved event on campus!

§ The companies participate because they are naïve enough to assume that 22 year olds can solve problems they cant!

§ The marketing association organizes it bcos it is the only work they do in the entire year.. and it is a great opportunity for them to make money. Charge a lakh from the company and pass on peanuts to each team for their expenses.. this is probably the business with the highest margins in India today!

§ People turn up for the freebies and gifts, with zero interest in playing the games

§ The profs agree to the whole nautanki because they are just glad the students are finally taking some initiative for an activity, albeit archaic and irrelevant!

§ Juniors put up with all the torture because they are told it is part of the college culture.

§ And the average senior (yours truly) takes up the elective so that he doesn’t have to sit through 20 lectures…

All the trouble started five days ago….i was grinning at having pulled off yet another triumph at making others work and lazing around myself…my team leader summons me… My devilish craving to hear others complain about work load when i had all the free time in the world caused me to reply… mistake number 1.

TL: “rishi… I have to tell you something…”

Aaha.. working yer ass off, aren’t u? how sad!!! Heh heh…

Me: “yeah, tell me yaar.. sorry I dint come for the meeting ….was caught up in traffic”

I mean I was chatting with a zillion people on the way to my room after dinner

TL: “rishi, can you be team leader?”

Today is april 1????

Me: “er….excuse moi???? What are you saying?”

Mad woman!!! Do the work and stop acting crazy!

TL: “I have a shortlist from a consult company. Interview is just 3 days after the fair…”

Who studies for 3 whole days???? Well, I guess that’s why you are the topper…

Me: “ok.. how about the others?”

Let someone else be the scapegoat…

TL: “no… 1 is in student association.. 3-4 have their lateral recruitment interviews…1 has found a new girlfriend… you are the only one….”

Only one what? Jobless guy around??? HEY!!! the other guy has a girl AND is let free....

Me: “ok.. I agree having a girlfriend is a 24 hour job.. ask one of the others”

This argument is not workin… gotta play to her fear…tell her about my abysmal CGPA

TL: “I’ve talked to the faculty….”

Aaha.. hez never gonna agree.. TLs have to be toppers.. no compromise there

TL: “….. he has agreed”

@#$%!!!! You convinced him, didn’t you?

To cut a long story short, an electrical engineer doing majors in finance in the bottom quarter of his class was anointed team leader for marketing fair! I don’t have to talk about how the story spread like wildfire, how the senior team members who initially assumed the topper would work galvanized into action on hearing about the restructuring in organizational structure. The student association member designed the games, the guy with the new girlfriend ran around for the façade. The faculty began to be impressed by the presence of all the senior team members at interim presentations (a significant deviation from the college tradition) and attributed it to the new team leader’s effectiveness… whereas I did what I did best – be dumb and clueless and nod intelligently to the endless amount of brainstorming and discussions happening!

Time passes by, the fair draws near… The organizers start panicking. “dude, your team hasn’t set up the stall yet. Other teams have gone to sleep.. should we help you?”

Mark of a great leader is to get resources for his team.. here I am, getting free labour!!!

The day didn’t go too well either… a guy comes running from another team, “dude, what morons do you have in ur team? This guy is putting the seal on the person’s hand. You are supposed to seal the ticket!!! This is not a disc…” I go repeat the same dialogue to the chap and he gives me a thou-art-holier-than-christ look…

A leader should command respect from his subordinates…

I know my games are long and complicated.. so how do i solve the problem of long queues outside my stall? Simple... use the external factors to my advantage, like a true leader.. "arre bhai sahab... lambi queue hai, itni garmi mein aap kitni der idhar rukoge? kisi aur stall mein jayiye, udhar bhi aapko gifts milenge" Use this to inspire your people.. "guys, fewest people came to our stall! thank me because i made you work so less"

And today, it’s all done… everyone thinks I’m a hard worker… juniors are glad all the seniors in our team helped them out a lot (none of them know why, though) and I have a CV-point to show my finance companies… team leader, marketing fair… Oh yeah, that reminds me i've to throw a team party with a difference (2 bottles of booze and music on the terrace instead of a dinner at the most expensive hotel in the city)... First of all, my team deserves a different party.. and more importantly it'll put a smaller hole in my bank account. I wonder whether leadership is the most redundant position in any organization….