Puppies and the man who died a Bachelor

aravind machi.....thanks for giving me a few ideas that made this blog possible....

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I am under 6 feet tall….Not a basketball player, not a guitarist….no 10+ lpa PPO….AND, I have “iyer” in my surname… all this qualifies to put me pretty much at the bottom of the dating hierarchy….. The latest addition to the conspiracy against me losing my celibacy is the litter of puppies on campus… freshly arrived….

“Insensitive brute….” The campus women gang up on the hapless man with a coffee in one hand and a coupla notebooks in the other, struggling to find his way through the endless number of puppies whose sole aim in life is to lick his chappals!!! You tell me now…is he to blame if amidst all the confusion, he accidently trips over a pup who has found it extremely convenient to settle between his legs???? To make matters worse, the poor guy just spilled all his coffee on one of the ladies desperately trying to catch hold of one of the puppies….The only thing left for him to do would be to order a coffin for himself and a tombstone that says, “Died a bachelor.. RIP”

What’s it with women and puppies??? Is it their motherly instincts or something??? One thing that makes people look like absolute morons is baby talk…. My gawd!!! I just cant stand them…. Cu chee cu chee cooo…. Is there anything on earth thts more incomprehensible???? What is it that makes people….Now… let me put this straight… We are not talking about Australopithecus here… (Well, I could have jus said prehistoric man.. but these jargons make me so much more intelligent than I am….) We are talking about supposedly intelligent homo sapiens… (ok, sorry…no more jargons…) who have the ability to think before they do stuff…. What is it that makes these people to look and sound so stupid in front of others???? Is it something like they keep their brains in the deep freezer before they get out of their hostel rooms or something????? If you thought you had trouble with all the women cu chee cooing, you see guys joining in the ruckus! Self respecting logical men trying desperately to edge out that basketball player to the top of the hierarchy!!!

Just step outside the campus and we have vast expanses of Jharkhand greeting us…. One of the poorest states in the country, maybe even in the world…. Thousands of starving kids, babies…. No one to give a damn! But here, four legged creatures are having a ball with people feeding them corn flakes, pedigree (Even a Regent breakfast comes cheaper than that btw….) Another set of student activists out to crucify some poor professor who had the foresight to dispose off the pups, calculating that the college would turn into nothing less than a zoo around a year from now… (Not that things are any better now… we have people who say cu chee coo!!!)

“Hey, look at this pup… the tip of his tail is white… lets call him tippy…HEY! I have a better idea…lets call him Tipu… Tipu Sultan!!!” I was fondly observing the metamorphosis of one of my close friends… He is already both a basketball player AND a guitarist… Plus, got a PPO also!!! Why would he do this to himself??? The poor freedom fighter would be turning in his grave….. At least it is heartening to note that centuries later there are still people who pay their tributes to their age old heroes!!!

And the pain of being a blogger is that you not only think of these things… u also commit a capital mistake by posting them on a site…. The condom company just lost a customer for life…. *sigh*